A Different Kind of Christmas

It was a different kind of Christmas.  My grandmother passed away in January of this year, and to say things have been different without her would be an understatement.  She had been sick for over a decade, and we were and are grateful for her complete healing in Heaven, but we still miss her.  When she went to Heaven, I found myself being selfish in what should be the most joyous of times.  There is one less place to visit on Sundays after church.  She always called to sing "Happy Birthday", a little off-key, but she made up for it with enthusiasm.  On my 24th birthday, I got one less phone call, one less song.  She wasn't there to critique my deviled eggs or punch bowl cake at 4th of July (trust me, she would find something that needed improvement haha).  She never got to see my wedding dress; I'm the only granddaughter who had an extra candle instead of her at my wedding.  When my sister cut 6 inches off of my hair (don't worry- she does hair for a living) the day before Christmas Eve, I had a slight feeling of dread for a minute over what she would say when she saw it the next day before I remembered she wouldn't be there.  It's been almost a year, but I find myself missing her more instead of less; it seems to get harder instead of easier.

I have to remind myself that her joy is complete.  That my mom has a saved voicemail of her singing "Happy Birthday".  That she always loved that I love to cook; that I cook the way she often did:  without recipes, by feeling and the occasional taste test.  That she had the best seat in the house for my wedding.  That she probably asked an angel to intervene before my sister cut half a foot off my hair.

In addition to my grandmother being in Heaven, it was my first Christmas as Mrs. Cook.  After a few squabbles in scheduling, everything worked out just fine for us to be able to love on both families and start our own Christmas traditions.  We are fortunate to have both families within less than an hour of one another and our home.  It has been so special to have this time together, to start our own memories as the Cook family.

It was a different kind of Christmas for us- our first Christmas as Mr. and Mrs. Cook, our puppy's first Christmas (yes, we are the crazy dog people), the first Christmas that we were responsible for all decorations.  It was a different kind of Christmas for our parents, with us waking up in our home instead of theirs.  It was a different kind of Christmas for my extended family, missing my grandmother.
But she had a different kind of Christmas this year, too- her first Christmas in the presence of the Savior.  Wow.  My grandmother loved a good party, and I cannot imagine the ultimate Christmas party she got to attend.  And I'm sure Jesus thoroughly enjoyed her rendition of "Happy Birthday" :)

Singing,
Kayla